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#12 30 DAYS POETRY CHALLENGE

I lost myself trying to be something I was not
I gravitated towards worldly things to keep myself satisfied
but I was too late to realise how much of it
kept me distracted from reality
and for far too long,
I lost sight of everything

I deemed attention, so I did everything to get it
but no matter how much I tried, and I really tried
I was never happy

I even looked at death in the eye
but death came to me and whispered
while I was so close to dying in my hospital bed
not now, your time will come, but not now

so I, who had already given up
had nothing left to give
what more could I have done

I didn’t want to live
life was too exhausting, and I could not take it any more
I was already done

I silently cried deep into the night
and it was louder than my actual voice,
I made sure no one could witness my broken shell
cause I wanted no one to see

I called out to God, but I think he was already there…